just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
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Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
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I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
My breasts were aching with rage.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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