Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
