I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
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