also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was