i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
