Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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