Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
