I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Randomize
