She bit a glass in half.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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