my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I wish i was in the wii world.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
