and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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