Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
