we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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