She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
