Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
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