Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Your penis caused this!
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