it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
