bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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