Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
