shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize