Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
a search helicopter?!
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
