dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize