Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
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