I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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