I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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