Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize