Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
party gras won. party gras always wins.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
