So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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