I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
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Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
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Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
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