lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
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I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
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IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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