i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
