i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
