Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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