There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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