I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
