Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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