Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
