He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
