was it more than 30 minutes?
then you're in a relationship
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.