I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
