I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize