That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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