Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
