I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
