Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize