Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
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I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
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I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
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