great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize