I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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