About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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