Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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