Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
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Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
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I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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